The path of meditation is not easy and straight forward . Day by day, moments of stillness, moments of confusion. Moments of peace and joy, moments of anxiety and fear. As i dredge the Psyche my mind moves through its ups and downs. Day by day its hard to tell where this thing is going, but it is clear that the goal of this practice is not to develop some imaginary ideal state where everything is wonderful by conventional standards. Behind the peace, behind the chaos, there is the same awareness abiding in equanimity. Seeing through the surface appearances, pleasant unpleasant or neutral, there is awareness, there is life. No matter what happened yesterday, what happens today, or what will happen tomorrow something keeps me going. When i find out what that is, ill let you know …